Taking seconds can be a humiliating process.
When I'm by myself, there is no shame. I don't take seconds, I take fourths. The apple squares that I made for "JR" and "a coworker's goodbye party" are slowly disappearing inside of my house when no one else is around. ...It's a mystery! When I make rice pilaf, there are never leftovers. I have eaten weight watchers ice creams until I am literally ready to bend myself over the toilet.
But in the real world, things change.
Like at big family dinners and get-togethers. These definitely don't prevent me from overeating, but shame finally enters the picture. Announcing that you're going in for seconds helps soften the blow. As long as you humiliate yourself, the second helping is less humiliating in itself. "Okayyyy, done! I'm getting more, my second plate!!" Then you hopefully wait for others to chime in "Okay me too!" "I'm already on my second!" and it makes you feel better about yourself. Occasionally you even throw in a "help!" after you're announcement, just to let everyone know that you realize what this looks like. But God help the person who really does ever try to intervene. So in this situation, full disclosure is the key.
Outside of family, things change even more. Like taking seconds at work. Say it's a coworkers birthday, and someone brought in ice cream, or cupcakes, or ice cream cake. We want to make sure everyone gets a piece, so the first round portions are not what we'd call generous. So sometimes I really want another slice! But is it appropriate to go back for more? And how do you do it without calling attention to yourself? Are people judging me when I go for another scoop? I'd say yes, since I work in public health. Meh. Are men the only ones who are allowed to have seconds at work without being considered piggish? So on a good day, I stick with the one helping. When things are bad, I wait until the leftovers are placed in the kitchen, and I take them when no one is looking. Problem solved.
Then there's a more intimatate environment, like when you're on a date or someone else is hosting a dinner and you're a guest. I had dinner at a friend's house the other night, something I'm not used to doing seeing as though I'm very new to the "adult" world. Everything was so delicious, I just wanted to keep eating it all. But, this isn't my house - this wasn't me overeating in the privacy of my own home. There was someone else there. So I stopped short of what I really wanted...which surprisingly still made me feel full. Who would've known?
I guess the moral of this story is about portion control. After thinking all of this through, I'm realizing I've had it wrong all along. Portion control isn't about will power and making yourself take smaller quantities of food and saving the rest for later. It's about having an audience. Because, it's too embarrassing to overeat in front of other people. So, who's coming over for dinner?
When I'm by myself, there is no shame. I don't take seconds, I take fourths. The apple squares that I made for "JR" and "a coworker's goodbye party" are slowly disappearing inside of my house when no one else is around. ...It's a mystery! When I make rice pilaf, there are never leftovers. I have eaten weight watchers ice creams until I am literally ready to bend myself over the toilet.
But in the real world, things change.
Like at big family dinners and get-togethers. These definitely don't prevent me from overeating, but shame finally enters the picture. Announcing that you're going in for seconds helps soften the blow. As long as you humiliate yourself, the second helping is less humiliating in itself. "Okayyyy, done! I'm getting more, my second plate!!" Then you hopefully wait for others to chime in "Okay me too!" "I'm already on my second!" and it makes you feel better about yourself. Occasionally you even throw in a "help!" after you're announcement, just to let everyone know that you realize what this looks like. But God help the person who really does ever try to intervene. So in this situation, full disclosure is the key.
Outside of family, things change even more. Like taking seconds at work. Say it's a coworkers birthday, and someone brought in ice cream, or cupcakes, or ice cream cake. We want to make sure everyone gets a piece, so the first round portions are not what we'd call generous. So sometimes I really want another slice! But is it appropriate to go back for more? And how do you do it without calling attention to yourself? Are people judging me when I go for another scoop? I'd say yes, since I work in public health. Meh. Are men the only ones who are allowed to have seconds at work without being considered piggish? So on a good day, I stick with the one helping. When things are bad, I wait until the leftovers are placed in the kitchen, and I take them when no one is looking. Problem solved.
Then there's a more intimatate environment, like when you're on a date or someone else is hosting a dinner and you're a guest. I had dinner at a friend's house the other night, something I'm not used to doing seeing as though I'm very new to the "adult" world. Everything was so delicious, I just wanted to keep eating it all. But, this isn't my house - this wasn't me overeating in the privacy of my own home. There was someone else there. So I stopped short of what I really wanted...which surprisingly still made me feel full. Who would've known?
I guess the moral of this story is about portion control. After thinking all of this through, I'm realizing I've had it wrong all along. Portion control isn't about will power and making yourself take smaller quantities of food and saving the rest for later. It's about having an audience. Because, it's too embarrassing to overeat in front of other people. So, who's coming over for dinner?
ahhah lani my fav part about this blog is in ur label section: fat ahahhaha
ReplyDeletetis me maria